Replaceable
I struggled this weekend with abandonment. My whole life I have had people just leave me. I have been replaceable so to speak. As I sat in therapy today I really struggled to go through today's session. I even looked at my therapist and I said “I want to quit.” I had tears streaming down my face thinking about everything that had corresponded this weekend. How I felt about my actions. All I could do was cry. This weekend I thought everyone had left me. Everyone abandoned me. Once again I was left alone. When I took a second to breathe I realized that wasn’t the case. I was adopted when I was about 8 years old. My last name was legally changed to my step-dad. When my mom and my step-dad got a divorce he didn’t fight for me. He just allowed my mom to take me. He could have fought for me. I was 16 years of age when they got a divorce. I was pushing 17. Even though I knew deep down it wasn’t because of me, I still believed it was me. Later on my mom remarried. She was wit...